| mothers day |
[May. 5th, 2010|06:22 pm] |
the best mothers day I have ever known was in 2004...I quit olive garden....got in my car and proceeded to pick up the most beautiful bouquet I could find...then I drove straight to wienberg village and proudly gave them to my Grammie...she beamed...she went around showing everyone in the retirement home what her granddaughter had gotten her for mothers day...such a small gesture but it made both of our days and its a moment I will never forget..I wish I could do it again...I would literally drive the almost one thousand miles if I could just see her smile like that once more...so my advice to everyone out there with a surviving grandma is to this sun...go pick her up some flowers...it will mean the world to her and when she is gone u can always know that u made her smile!! |
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| I love life |
[Mar. 25th, 2010|07:36 pm] |
| [ | Current Location |
| | dc bitches | ] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  bouncy | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | amanda's voice haha | ] |
so my happiness from here on out will come completely from myself and not how I feel about dudes!!! I realize in the past I let my relationships dictate how I was feeling...I am going to be happy bc I am awesome and have great friends and clean laundry and sheets haha...its really the simple things in life that make me happy and somehow I have lost that over the years and in turn lost myself...I have been through soo much bullshit its hard to even let the things that used to make me happy do their job...no more!!! I am going to be a little selfish and do only what feels right for me....fuck the rest...if a boy dosen't like me...his fucking loss bc I am sure there is one out there that will...not talking about anyone in particular just in general...I refuse to be the one that always gets hurt and to do that I will take control...I will make decisions based on whether I want to see him or not and even if he is worth my time....I will embrace my friends and dancing the night away...I will embrace nights in with wine and good music..company or not...fuck all the dumb shit I love life!!! |
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| I think |
[Mar. 11th, 2010|04:58 pm] |
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its ironic that my friend put me as the girl that always gets hurt on the facebook thingy....its true but in reflection I think I am letting my past effect my current endeavors...like I very much like a boy...he is awesome and great and we have just enough in common and different that it works...only I have already expressed almost a fear of getting involved...I don't want to get hurt again but then again if I don't let myself fall for anyone I will never find true happiness...I have no idea what to do in my current situation considering he lives 2 hours away in York PA and I'm sure that has something to do with why I am afraid to get too involved...ugh I just want to go to propagandhi tonight and see him haha |
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| (no subject) |
[Feb. 16th, 2010|04:32 pm] |
I'm an idiot....all he has to do is call me and be sweet and I get excited....its dumb...he is just going to break up with me again....history will repeat itself and I will be crying and alone soon enough...but I let myself believe that he really does care about me....that he realizes I could find someone else if I wanted to but I want him...I don't know why I want him...its not like he has treated me the greatest...on the contrary he dosen't treat me so great haha...I'm fucked up thats the only solution...oh well I'm going to plan a date |
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| lame |
[Feb. 11th, 2010|10:10 pm] |
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and crying about all this only runs my fucking make up haha |
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| men |
[Feb. 11th, 2010|10:01 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  confused | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | the wind | ] |
I don't think I will ever understand them...when I think they really like me they do something to change my mind and then the one that I think dosen't care at all.. all of a sudden does...I will be a fool if I go to the bar tonight but I haven't seen him in over a week and maybe I could talk to him about stuff but more then likely I will just get back with him...thats what I do ugh why couldn't what I wanted for tonight just happen ...fuck everything...I have no idea what to do and the worst part is no ones advice helps bc I feel they all judge things they can't understand....fuck I don't even understand |
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| sometimes time dosen't heal everything |
[Jan. 22nd, 2010|07:21 pm] |
REICHLIN, Shirley, age 89, of Tampa, died Thursday, August 21, 2008 at Menorah Manor, St. Petersburg. Mrs. Reichlin came to Tampa 20 years ago from her native, New York where she was the retired Executive Secretary to the original CEO of Revlon Cosmetics. Preceded in death by her husbands Richard Lehrich and Sam Reichlin, she is survived by her daughter and buddy, Gail and son-in-law, Howard Shapiro; grandchildren Ricky and Jackie Shapiro; sister Evelyn Schneiweiss; and loving granddoxies Dapple, Jimbo, Homer, and Iris.
I like to think that you are up there still cheering me on...still remaining proud of everything I do...I love you Grammie
PS and you guys wondered where my love of makeup came from!! |
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| shirley riechlin |
[Jul. 8th, 2009|02:13 am] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  depressed | ] |
what many of you don't know is how close I have always been to my grandma....was I was young I would spend at least two weeks a month at her apartment...I used to put on silly little performances for her...she would close her eyes during and I would get mad and she would tell me she was only resting her eyes which I didn't learn till much later that ur eyes didn't need rest and she would fall asleep...she would wake up later and we would dance around to laurence welk...the next day it was time to stop at the bank then the grocery store..then back home in time for price is right during which she would cook me my fave...french bread pizza and bread with farmer cheese...when she later moved to a retirement home I would go all the time and entertain Grammie and all her friends...then bingo and waterobics...she is such an amazing woman...through her life she has lost two husbands...both to heat attacks...but she kept going...I have always been her pride and joy...she carries around sooo many pics of me and can't wait to show people...I love doing anything to make her smile and when I lived in Tampa I would always bring her flowers on mothers day...we would spend later afternoons reading through her old poetry books...oh captain my captain always being our favorite...I have never asked this b4 but please pray for my grammie...she has been in the hospital since the weekend b4 last and I just don't know what I would do if I lost her....she has always been there for me and now I am a thousand miles away and can't be there for her....it makes me sick with guilt...she is almost 90 and I'm scared..I leave you with the beast poem ever written
O CAPTAIN! my Captain! our fearful trip is done;
The ship has weather’d every rack, the prize we sought is won;
The port is near, the bells I hear, the people all exulting,
While follow eyes the steady keel, the vessel grim and daring:
But O heart! heart! heart! 5
O the bleeding drops of red,
Where on the deck my Captain lies,
Fallen cold and dead.
2
O Captain! my Captain! rise up and hear the bells;
Rise up—for you the flag is flung—for you the bugle trills; 10
For you bouquets and ribbon’d wreaths—for you the shores a-crowding;
For you they call, the swaying mass, their eager faces turning;
Here Captain! dear father!
This arm beneath your head;
It is some dream that on the deck, 15
You’ve fallen cold and dead.
3
My Captain does not answer, his lips are pale and still;
My father does not feel my arm, he has no pulse nor will;
The ship is anchor’d safe and sound, its voyage closed and done;
From fearful trip, the victor ship, comes in with object won; 20
Exult, O shores, and ring, O bells!
But I, with mournful tread,
Walk the deck my Captain lies,
Fallen cold and dead. |
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| I"m pathetic |
[Jun. 18th, 2009|10:08 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  contemplative | ] |
I just cooked a great dinner and bought awesome beer and now I am sitting on my couch with my cat enjoying....just seems a little sad to do alone but oh well I guess |
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| so |
[May. 11th, 2009|03:03 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| | depressed | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | mad world | ] |
as fast as things go good they go bad...I can't believe people lie when they tell you they love you...thats really bad...oh well back out into the ocean for me....hoping the next guy to tell me he loves me really does...it never gets any easier...breaking up is hard to do...as said in a great song...the worst thing is he met a bunch of my family...my friends that live out of town...so I have to deal with everyone asking about him and then telling them we broke up |
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